Appointment Management And Self-Care As A Special Needs Parent

Appointment management and self-care can coexist.

As a special needs parent, you probably have a lot of appointments to keep. Doctor visits, therapy sessions, and school meetings can easily overwhelm your calendar. And your peace of mind.

But, there are ways to take care of yourself while taking care of these appointments.

Special Needs Parents and Appointments

Keeping appointments is important for your child’s care and wellbeing. They are also important to keeping up with medical care, medications, and services. This can in turn benefit you and the entire family.

However, scheduling and keeping appointments can often begin to feel like a juggling act.

If not approached with intention, you can quickly become overwhelmed. The opposite of self-care.

But, self-care and appointments can coexist.

Self-Care Steps and Appointment Management

It is important to look at three areas

• BEFORE the appointment
• DURING the appointment
• AFTER the appointment

Before the Appointment

Use a calendar. This prevents double-booking.

Set reminders. This is another way to prevent missed appointments.

Missing appointments can lead to fees, difficulty rescheduling, or being dropped from a practice. It can also lead to medication refills being missed. Missing therapy sessions can hold back progress. It is important to keep your appointments.

Keeping a calendar also helps if you need to reschedule. Most places would prefer some notice and will be more accommodating to a phone call to change than a no show.

Scheduling can also keep you on time for appointments.

Not all practices will allow you to arrive late. If you are late you may also miss valuable therapy time even if seen for a partial session.

I also find running late to be a major stressor!

Here are a few helpful calendars to get you started. Undated planners allow you to get started right away at any time of the year!

During the Appointment

Some appointments will require you to participate with your child. Others will require just your adult participation. And others you will spend in a waiting room.

Let’s look at some ways you can practice self-care during these three scenarios.

Appointments You Participate In With Your Child

Action Step: Be fully present. Turn off the phone.

Action Step: Take notes as needed. Ask questions.

Action Step: Allow your child independence. It can be tempting to help your child or answer for them. Let the doctor or therapist see where they are at.

Action Step: Remember that some tests require so many correct answers and so many wrong answers. In a row! Do not get discouraged when your child hits a test ceiling. Tests are designed for a range of ages and eventually everyone reaches a ceiling.

Appointments You Participate In Without Your Child

Action Step: Be prepared. If you received a draft of a report or document, read it before the meeting. Write notes and questions in the document.

Action Step: Be present. These are important meetings. They can also be more difficult. Hearing reports and evaluation results can be very overwhelming. It is ok to cry in these meetings. It happens more often than you think and everyone in these meetings should be empathetic.

Action Steps: Ask questions. Take your time. Make sure you understand what is being said and what is in the document. Make sure any medication changes are written down for you and sent to the pharmacy.

Action Steps: Give yourself time and space to process. Even if you have already done dozens of these meetings, each one can still be hard. Be kind to yourself. Lower some other expectations for the day where possible. A favorite meal. Ordering out. A longer shower. These can make a big difference on a rough day.

Appointments You Spend in the Waiting Room

Action Step: Remember it is great your child is able to independently attend some appointments. Even older children and teenagers can pick up on parent anxiety. Remain calm so that parting from you and going to the doctor’s office or therapy room is easiest for your child.

Action Step: You may have questions. Instead of using up valuable therapy time, ask for a time to call to discuss them. This may also allow for a more open discussion away from your child.

Action Step: Waiting rooms are not super fun. Bring materials with you! This may be a time to catch up on some bill paying or respond to emails. You could read a magazine or do a crossword puzzle. E-readers allow for lightweight portable reading. Check out this link for a free month of Kindle Unlimited. If you find the noise of a waiting room, audiobooks with earbuds are a great alternative. Check out this link for a free Audible Plus Trial. These activities make me feel a bit more productive and less drained than scrolling through social media. You may find it a great time to read through another post on Full Cup Caregiver 🙂

After the Appointment

Long day or difficult news? Go easy on yourself that night and the next day.

Action Step: Realize that once the meeting is over you still need to process and care for yourself. You may have hung up the phone and returned to your car, but this may be when the overwhelm hits. I can often focus for a meeting, but on the car ride home I feel drained.

Action Step: Review your notes. Write down any follow up questions. Reach out to the care provider with remaining questions at the next appointment or by email/phone.

Action Step: use your affirmations. You have completed an appointment! You are making steps toward progress. Even when it feels like a baby step. Need some ideas to get started with affirmations? You will find several ideas in Affirmations for Special Needs Parents.

Appointment Management And Self-Care As A Special Needs Parent: Summary

Appointments are not going away anytime soon. They serve an important role in your child’s and family’s overall well-being.

However, keeping up with all the appointments can feel like a challenge. Some can also feel emotionally draining.

Taking steps to care for yourself before, during, and after appointments is key.

This will allow you and your child to get the most benefit from the appointment. It will also help decrease stress and anxiety.

Here are a few more helpful planners to keep yourself organized. They can help keep appointments times and notes all in one place.

Time management is a big piece of planning for appointments. Check out this article for some tips: Finding Time for Self-Care for Special Needs Parents.

Appointments can be more stressful due the use of so many acronyms. Read Special Needs Acronyms: A Guide for Parents to gain a better understanding for your special needs parenting journey.

You may also be interested in Ways to Make Medication Management Easier for Special Needs Parents.

Keeping up with appointments while also maintaining a job is a challenge. You will find some helpful strategies in Work-Life Balance for the Special Needs Parent.